Bullet on Trial (Or, the “Justice” of Atheism)

William McGonagall was arrested for murdering Patrick Kavanagh on March 3, 2011. He shot Kavanagh in broad daylight, at a cafe` in Brooklyn when a fight erupted about the check, following a fight over reviews the men had received in the New York Times for their writing. Both of which were very bad. 

McGonagall is known as a staunch atheist, and it came to be that he stood trial before a judge who was also an atheist. On learning this, he devised what is now known as the McGonagall defense. Rumor has it that it was a bit of a surprise to his lawyer.

After the opening statement by the prosecution, McGonagall asked to approach the bench. “Your honor,” he said, “you and I are both men of science, not fettered by the constraints and definitions of religious tradition.”Image result for trial

The judge agreed. He had already allowed McGonagall to proceed without swearing to tell the truth with his hand on the Bible, but rather with his hand on his own heart.

“And as such it would be unjust to conduct this trial as though we were men of religion. It would be unjust and unwise for us to lay a foundation of Christian dogma to determine my fate, but rather we should lay a foundation of science and reason to proceed with this trial, should we not?”

The judge agreed. Continue reading

Posted in atheism, Philosophy, The Creation SoapBox | Tagged , | 4 Comments

The Tokyo Delusion

You know what I am sick of? People trying to force me to believe that Tokyo is a real city.

To be clear, I’m not saying I believe Tokyo is NOT a real city. I’m just saying I don’t believe it is, and there are NO good arguments for its existence. I just see a lot of weak minded children who believe everything they see on TV arguing that I HAVE to believe what they believe because REASONS. But no GOOD reasons!

So I did a little research to shut up the Tokyo Believers out there. Image result for tokyo drift mater Continue reading

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Modern Art Sucks Because Atheism is Stupid

When I was in college learning to be an Art Teacher, we were taught that one of the components of a good art unit, along with art history (Where did art come from?) and art production (How do you make it?), is the art aesthetic discussion (What makes it ART?). Image result for modern artSecularism had so numbed to the brains of all of my professors that when I asked them, “Well, how do you define art?” they said, “We can’t say, but that’s what the aesthetic discussion is for.”

And I said “I’m spending all of this money to become an art teacher and you guys can’t even tell me what art is?” They uncomfortably nodded yes. 

“So when people ask me ‘What do you teach?’ my answer is Well nobody really knows. REALLY?”

My professors didn’t know what to say. Apparently they never had a student who asked these questions before. Continue reading

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Science is a Belief System

Science is based on observation.

We see things happening again and again and eventually come to believe that they’ve always been that way and will always be that way. When we decide that a certain action or reaction happens consistently enough, we call it a LAW. The law of gravity, for instance, tells us that an object will fall to the earth if nothing interferes with it. In fact, the law tells us that it will ALWAYS happen, it always HAS happened, and we can even predict with accuracy how fast it will fall and for how long. 

We have some confidence riding on these Laws. If science were a casino, we’d be pushing all of our chips onto that square on the table labeled, “Laws of Physics.” The people watching may gasp, seeing us betting everything like that, even our very lives, but we’d just smile and say, “Let it ride.”Image result for casino

Or whatever people say in a casino. I don’t watch enough James Bond films to actually know. Continue reading

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Where an Atheist MUST put their Faith!

I had an atheist write in to tell me that “Atheism requires no faith and is not a worldview.” He argued that an atheist is a person who believes that the claim that there IS a God is “unsupported by good evidence.”

Now, I think I have clearly explained what the tenets of orthodox Atheism are in several videos and blog posts. Clearly it is a worldview. In fact, I call it a religion. But on a deeper level, this person was mistaken. Atheism DOES require faith.

Image result for atheist Continue reading

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There Are Only a Dozen Atheist on the Internet- and they are Professionals

I was watching most recent episode of Louder with Crowder in which they start the show talking about the historical fact that Jesus truly existed. I scrolled down to the comments and I saw one of the angry hostile atheist that has been leaving me comments on my website. It was then I remembered that some of the atheist that of been attacking me have also been writing on the Comedy Sojourn podcast website and I’m pretty certain I’ve seen some of the comments on both of our sites written by people who have written Ian Juby over on Genesis week.

Suddenly it occurred to me.

There are only a dozen atheists on the Internet!Image result for internet troll

Continue reading

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The Evidence for Atheism is: Ignorance

In the past I have said that there is NO ARGUMENT that can be made for atheism, and that no evidence exists which can be used as evidence FOR atheism. Well, thanks to the many conversations I have had on social media, I see I have been wrong, and I am a big enough man to admit when I am wrong. My many atheist readers/viewers have presented the same argument/evidence to me so often that I am ready to now admit that I was wrong, and they DO have a case for their position.

An Atheist’s primary argument and evidence FOR atheism is: his own ignorance. Image result for derp cat

Continue reading

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Louis Pasteur Confronts Darwin

Image result for louis pasteurIn the fall of 1860, the Linnean Society of London gathered for a dinner at which scientific papers were shared and discussed. One of the works discussed at length was On Origin of Species by Charles Darwin, first published only two years prior. The keynote speaker was Louis Pasture. Following is a transcript from the night’s proceedings. 

Master of Ceremonies: Gentlemen of the Linnean Society of London, it is now our honor to welcome the esteemed French Biologist, Mr Louis Pasteur. Many of you know him as the microbiologist and chemist renowned for his discoveries of the principles of vaccination, microbial fermentation and pasteurization. His work has not only proven the Law of Biogenesis, but has also contributed to our ability to halt the spread of disease, and the ability to preserve foods for much longer than previously possible, which will open doors for a boom in the grocery economy and safety for food consumers all over the civilized world. Gentlemen, please welcome, Mr. Louis Pasteur.

[a light smattering of polite applause]

Louis: Ok, look, I was going to read this paper on various methods of pasteurization, trademark mine by the way, but I just sat here listening to you old heifers prattle on and on about Charles Darwin’s new book, On the Origin of Species, blah blah blah. I have my copy here. I read it, and we need to have a littler family chat. Where is Darwin?

[Darwin raises his hand]

Hey, Chuck. You stink at writing. Anyone ever tell you that?  Dull as dirt and I gotta say your emotional issues bleed through this like a stuck pig in a satin dress shirt. Even on the cover you already stink. First of all it takes six and a half minutes just to read the cover. Ain’t nobody got time for that. A book needs a title, Chuck, not an abstract for your paper. How about something catchy, like, Darwin’s Magical Mystery Tree? Or, Evolution, a User’s guide. Or more accurately, “Sorry to bother you, but if you squint just right, don’t I look like a monkey.” Continue reading

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Stay On Book! (A Christmas Pageant)

STAY ON BOOK!

What better way to celebrate Christmas that with a pageant telling the story of Jesus birth? How about with a look backstage as your favorite celebrities come together to rehearse such a show? It’s not as educational as other depictions, but it is a lot funnier.

Enjoy, my friends!

And Merry Christmas!

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Believing in God is Like Believing in Santa Claus

Do Christians believe in Santa Claus?

Of course. He’s one of us.

You won’t get too far in the internet’s funderful world of Atheist Jihad Bloggers before you hear someone accuse Christians of being like those who believe that a fat man in a red suit comes down our chimney once a year to put toys in a sock. The connection they are trying to make is obvious- they think Santa Claus doesn’t exist- that only foolish children think Santa is a real person. And they think anyone who believes in God is similarly childish and silly. But they are wrong on both counts, and for the same reason.

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, and you have the right to believe.

But I would suggest you believe what is true.

The connection is something we call a Straw Man Argument. See, the version of Santa Claus the Blogger Jihad is referring to is the one created by Hollywood and Coke commercials, NOT the real one from history.

THERE’S A SANTA CLAUS FROM HISTORY?!??

Yes, Virginia. Now calm down before you spill egg nogg all over my tree skirt.RAF santapic copy Continue reading

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