Get a real paper copy of our latest book/first novel HERE!
Or get it for Kindle on AMAZON HERE!
(Or, and don’t tell anyone I told you this, visit our FREE BOOKS page to download it for free.)
and remember, Jesus Loves You!
A Murder of One- A Novel
Just added to FREE BOOKS here on ABitofOrange.com and soon to be available on Amazon on paperback or Kindle!
The first novel to be published by A Bit of Orange books, and a real novel too. Not the kind of quippy sarcasm and cartoon illustrations you get from a lot of our other books. This one is like if CS Lewis wrote the Twilight series. No teen angst, no sparkles, but a lot more world view philosophy and all of the vampires. It’s rated 12+ on Amazon, because, while the language is mostly family friendly, there is some dark thematic elements, some death, and far more blood than the average family friendly entertainment. Because, you know, vampires. And while we’re not going to tell anyone else this, because we’re friends I’m going to let you know, that this story is secretly an allegory for the Gospel. Like Chronicles of Narnia but without the talking animals. Learn more and read or download below:
She paused to look at Tragedy and me, again probably hoping we would tell the story for her, but again she would be disappointed.
“Tell us!” demanded Chocolat in his heavy French accent. “Why would she wan’ to die? She was immortal, like us. One of us. Why would one of us wish for death?”
“She had seen the hunter!” Geo blurted out. “Like Finch! They had seen the eyes of the hunter, the Hound of Heaven! Their sins burning them worse than the sun, and they wished for death to end the torment!”
“That is enough!” Rage bellowed. Geo shrank back as far as tragedy would let her. For the moment, she was silent, but in the moment that followed the whispers in the room erupted into shouting of anger, mockery, and fear.
“There are no hunters!” shouted Trash. “She’s a liar!”
“She’s a fool,” shouted another. “She expects us to believe legends.”
“Enough,” said Rage. Even without shouting it, he commanded the room and they obeyed.
“Three of our kind are dead,” I said to Rage. “Somehow this story starts with the first.”
Vampires have only one, all consuming desire: blood. Everything humans want- money, power, love, drugs- Vampires use these things to get the one thing they want. The only thing they need.
Lane is a member of a community of vampires in a city where they live as ghosts, kings, and the gods of hell. He is immortal, in a murder of crows who feast on death. He has lived more lifetimes than he can remember. His world is made of the immortal gods of hell and the humans they feast on. The only death they know is the kind they give to harvest blood. He and a goth girl who calls herself Tragedy sit above the world and mock it from above, untouchable.
Until the night Lane sees one of his own kind die, and suddenly there are whispers of something real from what they thought was myth.
And another one of his kind is dead, and another…
Is Lane being used by the head of the city to establish dominance in some political game, or have the hunters suddenly become the hunted? Is war coming, or something worse? And can he unravel the mystery before it’s too late, and he loses everything? As his world unravels and immortality slips from his fingers, he discovers that he might always have been a murder of one.
“Promise me something,” I said.
“What?”
“If he does come here… don’t try and protect me. If he comes here, run.”
“Lane…”
“Promise me. Please Tragedy.” I looked into her dark eyes and whispered.
“I don’t want to watch you die either.”
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
A Bit of Orange Books for Sale!
Selections from A Bit of Orange Books are now on sale via Amazon! Click the images below to visit the Amazon page where you can learn more and order paper back or Kindle versions of these books!
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
Now in Paperback! The Socratic Ducky!
The Socratic Ducky
This book takes a rubber duck level look at the kind of philosophy it takes to understand the Christian Worldview. If you can understand a rubber duck, you can understand why you can be certain that the Bible is true from the very first page. Learn about God, reality, truth, knowledge and faith! Then, learn a few arguments that prove that the God of the Bible is real, and is the one true God. Finally, spend some time getting to know the GOSPEL! The Good News of the love of God. Jesus Loves You! Read all about it.
It’s still free here on the web site, but now it’s in paperback and coming very soon for Kindle.
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
Now in paperback or for Kindle! Thursday Night Nachos!
Thursday Night Nachos (Defining Evolution Over Nachos with Friends)
Rent-A-Friend 2000 recounts the conversations he has with his friends at the local bar and grill, talking about Evolution. What is it? Is it science? How does it work? As they wait for their weekly pile of Nachos to arrive, the friends discuss the science and evidence in this sometimes complex issue and divide truth from fiction. If you want to see exactly what evolution is, and how Darwin fails the test of science, then this is the book for you!
Read or download below, or visit AMAZON to get it in paperback or for Kindle
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
New Book! Birds, Bees and Apple Trees
Have you ever wished you had a way to introduce your kids to the wonders of life, including where babies come from, in a way that doesn’t boil down to “here are some weird things your body is going to do starting in the 5th grade”? Would you like to introduce your kids to the science and miracle of life by reading a cute story about a worm asking why red apples are red? Sure, we all have! And now you can!
This book explains the birds and the bees by first explaining apple trees, and then showing how reproduction in flowers is mirrored in animals, and then in humans. It also explains why humans treat mating differently than any other animal, and explains why the sacredness of being made in the image of God is part of why we don’t go around naked in public, and why marriage is a sacred vow till death do we part.
This book isn’t about puberty, it’s about reproduction, starting with flowers and trees, and then fish and frogs, and then chickens and cows, and finally humans, modesty, and marriage.
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
UPDATED! Preachers, Perverts & Pandas
A Gay Debate! Transgenderism! Other Stuff! PG-13!
These are topics which could be updated indefinitely, but because of the cultural conversations, I’ve added more content to the gender identity/trans section. And I cleaned up the formatting because it looked terrible. I can admit that.
Read it here or download for free, and find more free books in the Free Books tab at the top of the blog.
In what is sure to be the reason I get kicked off of social media, I explain the debate over gay marriage, and why letting Pandas eat giraffes isn’t the loving thing to do. I explain how the American church has swung the reaction pendulum to both extremes of the LGBTQ debate.
I explain how the Transgender movement has failed so badly that I am Transgender (according to Google anyway) and yet the Transgender movement has literally made the rest of the rainbow flag into “bigoted oppressors”.
And we take a lengthy dive into the many ways a “LGBTQ affirming” church tries to use the Bible to teach things the Bible clearly does not teach. It’s a great lesson on how to start a cult. But the whole point is, whatever our sins, Jesus loves us. That’s the good news the Bible has for all of us, even when we’ve taken a few bites out of the giraffes.
Posted in Uncategorized
1 Comment
I Wrote a Book so Calvinists Could Tell me that I Hate the Bible
Remember all of those times I said “I don’t want to be one of those blogs that writes about Calvinism all of the time.”? Well, even so I wrote enough to make a full book out of it.
Look, I tried to get Calvinists to explain it to me so that it didn’t sound Baffling stupid, and I was unsuccessful. So now you get to read about it. Enjoy! It’s also available on our FREE BOOKS page.
Tip Toeing Through the TULIP
Or, Why Calvinism seems to be Bafflingly Stupid
I AM CLAIMING THE RAINBOW FLAG AS MY OWN!
From henceforth, I am claiming the rainbow flag as my own. From this day forward, let it be known that the flying of the RAINBOW FLAG is done in honor of A BIT OF ORANGE- which every flag already contains. A bit of orange I mean. It’s between the red and yellow.
Although we should start making them with a MUCH wider Orange stripe, as it is the most important one. But, we’ll use what we have until then.
The RAINBOW flag shall NO LONGER be known as the “Pride flag” but instead shall be known both henceforth, but also retroactively as the BIT OF ORANGE FLAG (or, the “A Bit of Orange” flag. Both are permissible.) To save time, such as in a hashtag, you may refer to it as The BOOF. But not the BOOV, because those are the humorous world conquering alien creatures from the Dreamworks film HOME.
Anyone who claims that anyone has displayed a BIT OF ORANGE FLAG for any purpose other than to honor me and my wisdom/webpage/wit/etc. shall be mocked as an ignorant liar and told to do some form of internet penance, like eating Tide Pods or something. We’ll workshop it and get back to you.
Some of you are confused, so let me address the obvious questions.
Q & A time!
Q: What gives you the right to declare the meaning of something which is already being used as an established symbol?
Answer: I’m on the internet.
If you’ve been on the internet, you have seen how it works. Something which used to mean one thing- like the “OK” hand gesture, or the phrase “colored people” or bananas. All three are now (we are told by the internet) unforgivable symbols of racist hate. Now the “OK” hand gesture (or to our friends in the deaf community, the number 9) means “White Power.” And it always has now. Why? Because someone on the internet said so and CNN took their word as an ABSOLUTE authority. That is the power of the internet and I an wielding that power with an iron fist.
Also, while “colored people” is vile and racist and hateful, you are REQUIRED to use the term “people or color,” because that is COMPLETELY different. People didn’t know that back in the age of the Boomers, but we know now that they SHOULD have.
Q: So are you saying A Bit of Orange is a gay/trans/etc pride supporting ally?
Answer: No, I am saying the LGBTQ (etc) community has been promoting their love and honor for me and this website at all of their parades, bars, clubs, and socio-political events. And as soon as I trade mark it, they will owe me a TON of money.
And of course I appreciate their love and support.
Q: What if people continue to use the rainbow flag as a symbol of LGBTQ (etc) Pride?
Answer: That would be horribly hateful and intolerant and I would encourage Elon Musk to cancel their Twitter accounts even though he most likely will not. Once somebody on the internet says something means something, then it does. That’s it. There’s no vote. Everyone just has to let everyone else know so they don’t do anything hateful and intolerant, like using MY RAINBOW FLAG to mean something vile, sinful and perverse. Because I will make fun of people if I have to. I’ll type all KINDS of mean yet undeniably funny things if it comes to that.
It doesn’t matter what THEY think they’re using it for. It MEANS an allegiance to the greatness of me and my web site. To say anything else would be… well, not OK.
Posted in SocioPolitico, Uncategorized
Tagged A Bit of Orange Flag, gay, LGBTQ, pride, pride flag, rainbow, rainbow flag, trans
Leave a comment
A Bit of Orange 