I was watching most recent episode of Louder with Crowder in which they start the show talking about the historical fact that Jesus truly existed. I scrolled down to the comments and I saw one of the angry hostile atheist that has been leaving me comments on my website. It was then I remembered that some of the atheist that of been attacking me have also been writing on the Comedy Sojourn podcast website and I’m pretty certain I’ve seen some of the comments on both of our sites written by people who have written Ian Juby over on Genesis week.

Suddenly it occurred to me.

There are only a dozen atheists on the Internet!

I don’t mean average skeptics or ordinary unbelievers, I mean these idiot Troll Atheists who show up and leave pointless, hate fueled ranting which BARELY (if ever) gives indication that they have read or watched the post they are replying to. There’s not a lot of these guys. There are MAYBE a bakers dozen of them. They probably have a small collection of hateful Atheist comments that they just copy and paste all across the internet from the safety of their cartoon avatars and semi-clever pseudonyms/mom’s smelly basement. They’re just all unemployed and really really bored! And ASTOUNDINGLY stupid. 

Or are they? 

When I said they post their comments all across the internet, I mean they LITERALLY copy and paste the same stupid comments over and over on any video or blog which is any way conservative, Christian, or Creationist. John Branyan* told me that he once did a little searching and found the EXACT SAME COMMENTS, word for word, from the comments section of his blog on several dozen other blogs across the internet. So these atheist trolls are unimaginative and stupid BUT- here is my theory:

They are professional Atheists.

Think about it. What makes more sense? That this small collection of idiots are posting the SAME dumb, hateful comments all over the internet -sometimes for YEARS- without reading or watching the things they are commenting on, or that they are getting paid to do so? Can an atheist REALLY be SO STUPID so as to find some pleasure or sense of fulfillment by spending their brief and fleeting days from now until oblivion erases their existence by harassing Christians on the internet? Or would it not make MORE sense that they are getting paid to do this by some rich scum bag? Because if I was getting paid by some rich scum bag to harass Christians online, I would totally copy and paste all day long. It’s SO MUCH easier than reading or listening and actually responding to the content of a post.

And all you have to do is read the comments on any Christian/Creationist blog or YouTube channel. Seriously! Find ANY Christian writing or talking about Atheism or evolution and read the comments. You’ll see a lot of the same comments from a lot of the same people. But be prepared for a level of Dumb which shall surpass all of your previous experience.

I get comments ALL THE TIME which are not only dumb, but honestly give NO indication that the person leaving the comment watched or read anything beyond the title. I even made some snarky generic replies because this was happening so often. But now that I have seen the comments on other people’s channels, I am seeing a trend. Not only is it the same brainless, hateful garbage spewed out by Atheists all over the internet, but by THE SAME ATHEISTS!

So to all of you, my fellow Christian bloggers, podcaster, vloggers, etc. Don’t fear the army of Atheist haters on the internet. It’s an army made of a dozen fat, lazy dorks who are getting a little better than minimum wage to troll you online from their mom’s basement which smells like dryer sheets and cheep cigarettes, both of which are working their hardest to cover the stench of unwashed angry blogger man-child. That’s why they can’t answer a direct question, make a valid point, or even give evidence that they have read or watched your content. They’re not getting paid to. Roach Clowns are getting paid to harass, and that doesn’t take any more than a caps lock key, a small collection of swears, and Ctrl + v.

If they go so far as to leave a quote from a popular As-Seen-On-TV “scientist” or to reference something you actually said in your content or replies, then maybe consider writing them a letter of recommendation, because, compared to their peers, they are going above and beyond.

#JesusLovesYou

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*Oh, oops. Let me pick up that name I just dropped there. My bad. Justin Timberlake tells me I do that all of the time.