During this series I’ve been focusing on how Roach Clowns all the time be demanding evidence for the existence of God, but they are not the only people who ask for evidence for the existence of God. Lots of people do and ought to ask for evidence for every part of the Christian worldview. What makes Roach Clowns unique is that they have absolutely no desire to hear the answer, and will do anything in their power to ignore, misunderstand, or make fun of any evidence you provide.

When Roach Clowns ask you to give evidence for God, they are like Midwesterners who say, “How are you doing?” We don’t really want to know how you are doing. It’s a greeting. It simply means, “I acknowledge your presence in my vicinity.” You’re supposed to reply, “Fine,” or “Good,” and then quickly change the subject. When a Roach Clown says, “What evidence do you have for the existence of God?” what he means is “I don’t understand your position, but you’re wrong and I hate you.”

Naturally, the meaning does get lost in translation.

A friend of mine- not a Roach Clown- once asked me to give him evidence of God’s existence. So I said, “OK, how about the entire universe?” The look on his face told me he was expecting something smaller, but I figured, if I can start with everything, then this would expedite the conversation. I’m all about efficiency.

When asking for the cause of something, you need to look for something other than itself. Nothing can be its own cause. You can’t be your own mother, a car can’t build itself, and a tree comes from a seed from a previous tree. Everything needs to come from something else, and that something else has to have the properties it takes to make the something in question.

The universe is really only made of four things: Time, Space, Energy, and Matter.

Thus, to explain why there is a universe- to explain why there is time, space, matter, and energy- we need a cause which is timeless, space-less, tremendously powerful, and immaterial. I hope that as soon as you see this list you’ll realize that, while it’s not God’s entire resume, it’s a thick enough slice to make a sandwich from. Who or what other than God is timeless, space-less, tremendously powerful, and immaterial, and would likely create a universe of such intricate design governed by laws and full of information?

It’s so obviously God that a lot of atheists do back flips and other clownish routines just to avoid the obvious conclusion.

William Lane Craig once asked this question of an atheist during a debate*- If not God, then what or who? The atheist, desperate to squirm out of an obvious conclusion suggested a vastly powerful computer that could make the universe. Dr. Craig pointed out that he was suggesting a timeless, space-less, immaterial computer. But computers are made of matter, take time to process, and exist in space. The atheist squirmed even more and tried to stick with his answer. Dr. Craig simply made the observation that is was not a computer he was talking about. He was talking about God but using the word “computer” to avoid having to say “God.” And at this point the atheist changed the subject.

When it comes to the universe, some people are actually stupid enough to say it literally came from NOTHING. A Professional Roach Clown named Lawrence Krauss wrote a book called “A Universe From Nothing,” and even debated Dr. Craig on the subject. Here’s the joke: He knows that it’s not true. If you read his stupid book you’ll find that, eventually, he admits that he’s using the word “Nothing” to mean something other than “Nothing.” You know how I’ve been attacked by Roach Clowns because I insist on using the word “Atheist” to mean “Atheist”? This seems to be a theme with these guys.

When Krauss uses the word “Nothing,” he is referring to “The Quantum Vacuum,” which is a vast sea of powerful, fluctuating energy which has properties and some organization according to those properties- which is obviously not Nothing. It’s something. Now, even when “Nothing” and “The Quantum Vacuum,” are defined correctly, Krauss is wrong, but the bigger problem (which he depends on to sell books) is the fact that far more people will buy his book than will actually read it, and far more will read it than will get to the end where he admits this lie, and far less will understand what a jerk he is for being a big liar. What results is Roach Clowns all over the internet, and sometimes in newspapers and on CNN will say, “Scientists have proven that the universe came from nothing!”

Sigh, roll eyes, face palm.

Let me dispel this idea in short: Whatever properties are needed to make a universe- NOTHING does not have those properties. I mean, take ANYTHING you can imagine. A unicorn, a toaster, a toenail clipping. Whatever properties a cause would need in order to bring about that unicorn toaster, or toenail clipping, NOTHING DOES NOT HAVE THOSE PROPERTIES. Nothing doesn’t have ANY properties.

That’s why it’s called NOTHING.

This is the intellectual level one must reach to get on keel with Roach Clowns. I have to explain what NOTHING is. Remember when common sense was common? I miss those days.

Next time I will provide even more scientific evidence for the existence of God. Until then, remember: #JesusLovesYou

Here’s the actual exchange*:

*In case you were going to write in and complain that I didn’t get the exchange verbatim. I knew that already.